Husband Messed Up So He Bought Me…..

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So we are not struggling… But something is going on. Eric and I relationship wise is doing great – but I think the nerves of becoming parents is starting to show. I am currently 17 weeks pregnant and we are realizing — we will have two newborn infants. We have waited SO long to get pregnant I do not either one of us thought about the end goal – actually taking care of a child much less two.

For myself – I have been dropping the ball with some work things. But I mainly cannot remember anything. I keep forgetting to pay certain bills or spill a 32 oz of water all over the couch. But I do feel better I have signed up for us to take some parenting classes that will cover things like how to diaper a baby ( something we both have no idea about). I also started to put some baby things away. But I still feel overwhelmed especially since the bump is growing a TON – I measure 6 weeks ahead so it is like I am 23 weeks pregnant.

Eric – I do feel badly for him. He is trying so hard to keep work going and help out around the house. But there are mistakes being made ( and kinda big ones). Twice this month he has left the fridge door open all night – I normally check now but sometimes I fall asleep before I do. Long story short – most of the food has been thrown out twice – the temp gauge went up to like 60 degrees. The last time it happened he felt so badly about it that he brought me flowers ( you can see them above).


I hope we stop messing up soon – any advice would be awesome. We basically feel like chickens with our heads cut off.


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  • Rebekah

    One, you’ll forget lots of things and things will go past due dates and it will still be okay. It’s completely understandable. You’ll realize you won’t need as much stuff NOW versus later. Just enjoy them babies and try to rest as much as you can when they sleep (I had a baby in November, and I’m just now getting into a groove). Two, maybe set alarms for due dates of certain bills? Our fridge has an alarm? if sorts if you leave the door open for too long. I got it for the kids, but it’s worked for me as well. You can also set a sign out somewhere that says “is the fridge shut?” So either of you know to check it. Life gets hectic when you’re pregnant, and it will more after. But! It’s worth it and soon, you’ll be into your own groove again.

  • Louise

    Baby brain, it’s normal. Don’t worry it’s all normal. You’ll be super tired and forgetful. If I left the fridge open I’d make sure it’s not something wrong with it, then maybe only buy a really small amount of food, we had to go to the store daily for a while. Set an alarm to remind yourself to check the fridge. Parenting class, books are a good idea. Ar the end of the day embrace the mistakes and experiences, love every minute because it will go so fast. Stick up reminders, lists, stickers anything to help remember. I forgot something today and my husband has put up sticky labels everywhere, including the door to help me remember. I hope these give you some ideas. Everybody has their own way of parenting, trial and error to find what works for you and your family. Don’t forget graandparents they are life savers.

  • Rebecca Eckstrom

    My twins are now 25 and both are in the Navy. I truly believe your instincts will take over. Will you make mistakes? Probably, but your children are very forgiving. All they really need is your love. You guys will do great! God bless all of you!

  • Desirae Soares

    Write things down. Post it notes, notes on your phone, lists on the fridge, whatever will help you to not forget important things. I always say if I don’t write things down when I think if them it’s gone forever lol. I keep a small notebook in my purse just to keep all my little reminders to myself together. I also set a lot if alarms on my phone to remind me when to pay certain bills or do certain things. Hope this helps! 🙂

  • Crystal Cook

    Hang in there. Pregnancy brain is a real thing. :). People have been having babies for all eternity. Most of them have no idea what they’re doing in the beginning. You will learn as you go. Don’t put too much stock in books and classes ideas of normal and correct. There are no textbook babies or pregnancies. Don’t be hard on yourself or your hubby. You’re learning together. Just know that as long as you and baby are healthy and happy, you’re doing it right.

  • Terri

    As a mom of 5, my babies are twins who are graduating high school this year, here’s my 2 cents. 1. Pregnancy brain, and mommy brain are real things. You will forget things, you will feel like you’re brain dead, and you’re not alone. Use timers, sticky notes, anything as a visual reminder to help you remember things. Set a time for 8pm or whatever time, so that someone can check the fridge.
    2. Go easy on yourself. Being a new parent will be nothing like you’ve expected. A new parent to twins is an entirely different level. But don’t fret. You’ll learn how to diaper a baby, you’ll learn how to make sure they’re both fed and both changed, you’ll find what works for you. Babies are amazingly resilient, and they’ll be just fine. Don’t stress, it will all be good, and you will all survive 🙂

  • C

    Take things one day at a time. Find ways to relax. Warm bath with essential oils and peaceful music helps. Make list of your monthly bills and mark a calendar that you will see everyday. It may seem weird but hang it by your toilet. I mean sometimes you have nothing else to do while ya know you’re going! Also, your hubby will see it and be reminded too! As far as being a mom and dad…don’t be too hard on yourself, don’t forget to take some “me” time and remember that you were not born being parents and having all the answers so don’t expect to know everything. Also, don’t compare yourselves to other parents! You will get it all together even though right now it seems like a mountain ahead of you! My boys are 19 (joined the army and serving in Korea) and my other son is 16 (hormonal teen years). I am already feeling such horrible empty nest and let me tell you it is tough to get through. So please, you asked, for advice…just soak in every moment you can with your precious babies when they get here and enjoy every kick and squirm you feel inside of your womb. They are precious memories you will never forget. Prayers for you, your husband, and your precious babies. Have a great night!

  • Myra Moir

    On a practical note on the refrigerator. The door should close on it’s own or without much effort. Check to see if it is level. It may need the feet adjusted so it closes better. Try Googling it to see how to do it. It’s easy. Good luck!

  • Myra Moir

    Just to be clear…I meant level the refrigerator and possibly adjust the door. ^^^
    Also, maybe consider putting your bills on auto pay for now. I finally did that with the ones I tended to forget or had large penalties.

      • Sara

        Maybe get a temp alarm on the fridge. Ours has an automatic one that beeps if the temp gets too low. My hubs and I also survive through shared google calendars and put everything on there from reminders to give the dog heartgard to paying the bills to important appointments. Good luck!

  • Corrie

    I have two sets of twins and 2 simpleton babies….. My biggest thing to tell you is stop and breath…. It is hard and it is overwhelming at times but stop and breath…. If you need it ask for help and if someone offers you help take it…. With my older set of twins I was a single mom… I worked three jobs at one time and had my 7 year old boy and my 6 month old twins one night and I just lost it…. the next morning I quiet two job of my 3 jobs and had to have a few hours down time a week… a movie was my Down time i would go watch one movie a week 2 hours and that made the coming week so much better for me… just like i said breath it will all come together and work out…. Good luck and can’t wait to see your girls… My girl twins are going to be 16 in June but I still remember the whole time they were little… Enjoy it it goes by to fast….

  • Dorothy

    Relax and enjoy this time of your lives. You guys are gonna rock as parents. Look how well you “parent” Wilson. We all have learned through trial and error. Xoxo

  • Christina

    Pregnancy brain is a REAL thing and I think it might be contagious!

    Give yourself time and grace. This is a HUGE thing that’s happening and it will take getting used to, but you’ll be amazed at how much you’ll figure out along the way.

    I only had one, but those first few weeks my only goal was to keep us all alive! LOL, not clean or anything else…..just alive!

  • Holly

    The first thing that tipped me off I was pregnant was vomiting, but the second was baby brain. I knew when I found the buttermilk warm and festering in the cabinet instead of the fridge I needed to test.
    Baby brain definitely happens, and it can be frustrating, cut yourself some slack. It gets worse when the baby (plural for you!) get here. But after a few months you find a groove. I am still in the “messing up” stage with my 3 week old (#3 for us). You’ll get there, just relax, you’ll laugh about the stupid crap you did someday.

  • Kristen

    Ok first thing, stop preparing so much. Over preparing and feeling like you have to have everything done and know everything all right away will make it worse. Yes I know that sounds so wrong but with mistakes made and how you are feeling is a clear indicator, slow down. Do you have friends with babies? Slow down and just go hang out. Shadow a friend or a mom for a bitZ just go visit and hang out. See if you can see the basics like changing a diaper. Feeding. But don’t utilize that time to visit like stress learn learn learn. Visit, bond, have fun, watch and take things in. It sounds to me like you need to slow way down right now. Slow is fast. Let your friends and parents help you on prepping but slow down. You have time and you will learn as you goZ yes you will have two and it will be more. However more stress on you now, isn’t good for your, the babies or mom and dads. Slow way down. Do a couple things a day and that is it to focus. Many people don’t prepare at all. Over prepearing can cause more stress and make it harder than it can help. I know you have amazing parents thy are going to be there for you. You won’t do this alone, and your parents had kids. They raised babies. They will be great mentors to start out. Best advice as stressful as it is as I feel like I know you well with organization, preparing and being able to control those things, slow way way down. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself now and for you and Eric. Trust me on this one. Slow down. There are no manuals on raising kids, no matter how many books are out there, the more focus you put on preparing and stress, the harder it is. No manual, don’t stress it, slow and steady. Way easier said than done but I have been active in babies lives, I knew how to change a babies diaper at 10. I was baby sitting at 12. My sister and I are 8 years apart and at a certain age I raised her more than our parent. And I have been a significant part of children’s lives ever since in many capacities. I still don’t know if all and I have a lot to learn. Slow and steady.